When our third child, Skye, was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at the age of 11, our family was forever changed. Her diagnosis would be the beginning of many. What we did not know is that even though the days seemed long and the nights shorter we would eventually find ourselves into a routine known to us as normal.
Now at the age of 17 our daughter is preparing to graduate from high school and start a new level of adulthood and independence. April 25, 2014 will mark 6 years since the diagnosis day. What I have found myself reflecting on is how very different it has affect all 6 members of our family.
Me (Mom)- The Caregiver. Although we share the responsibility of Skye's health, I tend to put the entire responsibility on myself. This includes being present at ALL doctor's appointments, managing pump settings, setting the alarm and getting up in the middle of the night. In addition when Skye's health is not the best or she is sick, I take it personally. I often feel that I have failed in my responsibility as her mom to ensure she eats properly, checks always and is changing her pump site on a regular basis. What I have learned over the last couple of years is that it is okay to let go. My husband has taken Skye to several appointments without me and guess what? Everything turned out okay! I know amazing right. I can actually share this responsibility. Skye has also stepped up to take responsibility of her site changes and ensuring that she always has supplies on hand. Her increased responsibility is still in a work in progress, but we are getting their.
Dad- Mr. Realistic. The person in the family who thinks things through before reacting. The one who says lets figure this out on our own and then talk with the doctors. The one who pushes Skye to be independent and believes she can do it. The one who never allows her condition to be an excuse for behavior (yes I am guilty by always asking first "have you checked?"). Dad is the one who brings the balance to emotions and gets everything turned back around when it seems to be spiraling out of control. He makes Doctors appointments interesting and hospital stays unforgettable.
Older Sister Bryanna- Ms Emotional. Her heart is so big! She may not be able to administer shots or stand watching a site change, but she WILL make sure to an alarm to wake her sister up to check multiple times during the night when she stays at her house. When she hears she is sick, she is concerned. When she hears of complications with others, she is concerned. I do believe if she were able to be granted one wish in life it would be that to find a cure for Type 1 diabetes.
Older Brother Chris- The Drill Sergeant. Christopher is constantly on top of Skye about taking care of herself and that her long term care starts with her first. Christopher lets Skye know that if she wants change, she has to make it because this is her life. If she wants to live a long healthy life she must start now. Chris will spend his time researching foods, drinks and activities that are important to Skye's overall health.
Younger Brother Matt- Happy Go Lucky. Matthew's attitude is what disability. He treats Skye no different and moves through life as if everyday is the same. He expects Skye to meet every responsibility and tasks just as he does and rarely brings up the fact that she even has type 1 diabetes. If he is asked he will relay a message or remind her to grab her supplies. Other than that he just lives life everyday with his sister, whose not so normal in his eye but it has nothing to do with the fact that she has type 1 diabetes.
Each of our roles form a support group and help our family function together as a complete unit. I provide the slack when Skye feels overwhelmed with the tasks of responsibility, her dad is able to balance out the emotional roller coaster that this life will often find us on, Bryanna reminds us that though we live life everyday as normal as any other family we can never forget the risk that is ever present in Skye's life. Christopher pushes Skye to take control of her life so that she will be with us for a very long time living a healthy life. And Matthew allows Skye to just be a normal teenage girl by providing moments when her condition is not even an issue or a factor.
While we each deal with unexpected situations in our family in various ways, we together keep the family strong. It's a family thing! Has your family faced unexpected changes through loss of a loved one or an unexpected diagnosis? These situations can rock our world, knock us off our feet and challenge who we are as an individual and as a family unit. The first year of Skye's diagnoses went so fast I barely remember it.
We have each made adjustments and each found the role in which we fit. There are still bad days in which Skye's diagnosis causes frustration and life is crazy. But despite the bad days, despite the times of frustration and conflict, good days always return! Maybe our roles will once again change in the future, but for now we have found our place and together our family is strong! Together we hold on to hope for cure, hope for a long and healthy future for Skye and all those living with type 1 diabetes.
Follow Skye and Bentley's Journey to a Cure to learn more about life with Type 1 diabetes and what we are doing to stay strong and be supportive as a family!
.jpg)
.jpg)